Am I Famous Now…

When months ago, I started blogging at Jack of all Blogs it meant a change in my blogging pattern. For the first time I had the occasion to collect a buck for my useless writing, but more even I wrote on a read blog. Suddenly I started working my entries and occasionally even proofread them.

But at the same time it was my downfall. Suddenly I was part of a network. Suddenly people who genuinely made me *yawns* had become colleagues, netfriends.
Before, I was famous in my little mind and that of 3 more link whores bloggers, now suddenly hundreds of people read me and I was not that free anymore in my ranting.

With time I gained authorship on several critical blogs, enough to spread my rants all over the place, but still there were several bloggers I did not dare to flame, [comment] bait. Because they were part of the same network… and I have ethics.
Before I posted whatever struck me at that moment, and it was easy: I hardly had to respect anyone, because nobody knew me.

That day I was the newcomer who hadn’t proven anything yet. Today I am the one who still hasn’t proven anything, anything other than being harsh and inconsistent.

I am a critical person. But I have a [more than] fulltime job next to blogging. I don’t manage it to whip out every day several entries for different blogs. Not that I’d want to have to, because when I blog I think I have something to say, something to add.
And although I am a hermit, even online, I know that many people know who [i]Franky is when I leave a comment or email them.
But I hardly have regular contact with many bloggers I read or bloggers who have watched me when I started at JOAB and who waited, waited to see if I’d become the newest kid on the block or not.

I didn’t.

I’m a bad pimp. I am not good at pimping myself out. Pimping myself out online. Leaving comments all over.
I will rarely make the first step to get in touch with someone [online], but I’ll still respect them, because they are in the same echo chamber kitchen as I am.

I suck. In the end I am nothing more than a good old fashioned columnist. A critic. A critic who sadly doesn’t have time to go pro because I have a full time job, a job which pays my bills.
And I’d rather be a columnist than an Adsense whore.
I love being read, but more even… I think it’s time to finally get in touch with the people I learned to know and exchange some… enough exchange ideas and opinions. Enough exchange to realize, remember why I respect the pros, even though they might have fallen in to the pattern of routine, a pattern which makes me *yawn*.

They get bucks for blogging, I get bucks for blogging but in how far are we totally free?
When I analyze and criticize the handbrake is pulled. Because I wouldn’t want to offend anyone who doesn’t know that a rant means that I like them. That I like them enough to spend time to write and rant about them.
And yes… some day I will adjust the size of the header.